In a world full of people, choose to be Yourself

Today in America, there is so much excess.

Excess stuff, Excess technology, Excess Hate, Excess Fear, Excess media, Excess mulling about in other people’s business.

We find ourselves bombarded by media, by news, by socialites of the world, by good, by bad, by so much filtering, and we find ourselves believe WE are inadequate.

We see things happen around Us, and we fail to react, we fail to feel. We are too busy wondering what if, what if they hear me, see me, know me, talk about me…

SO WHAT?! let people talk, let people see, let people hear, YOU are amazing, You are Unique, you are the only YOU there is. If you deprive the world of your beautiful and unique essence how will there ever be record of YOU. Live your live, love people, love Yourself, Let people hear you speak, sing, laugh, argue, fight, let people See you dance, talk, perform, chat, Let the world experience you. I assure you in reality the vast majority of people around you are far too self involved to care what you do, but for those few people who remain Connected to People and not technology, they will get to experience ALL that you are and will be better people for it.

I was never one to speak up, act out, participate in things where I may be seen, yet I have been put in places and positions where Everyone notices me. One thing I can share is sometimes it still makes me uneasy and weirded out, but so many more times it comes back to me in waves of positivity, people touched by my words, songs, encouragement, leadership.

id never dreamed of being where I am, or ever even starting to write a blog like I did years ago. Sure a few people only view it, but still expressing my thoughts where someone else can comment on them, was never my move. it was never my plan, sometimes we have to go out into the world and move mountains, be the change, make the change. Sometimes we have to be bold enough to Choose to be OURSELVES, not some carbon copy of someone else.

 

Choose to be YOU always and forever, there is no one better.

Some may be quicker, wittier, smarter, but NONE will ever have the essence that you bring and that brings people Joy. If you were different you’d probably have different people in your life, those who are near you love you for YOU. So keep being that person.

xo

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When is it enough?

Do you ever feel like you are flying about from space to space with no real destination?

Like you want to belong somewhere, with someone, have a place to call yours, yet you never find it?

I have felt this way too, and wondered often times, when is it enough?

When is it enough of pleasing others, and leaving myself to be last?

When is it enough, to wait on others but never get called up?

When is it enough, to give myself away and get nothing in return?

I’ll share a secret, we need wait for no one, we need lack nothing, simply we must put on our walking shoes, and get moving, get in action and take charge of our lives, our happiness.

Only when one finds happiness within will all these other things really ever be sufficient.

What is it worth to me to have someone next to me, yet I always feel insecure, that isn’t a happy life, that is an empty life filled with voids.

I seek not the voids, but the actual fulfillment of my own desires and happiness, and in my walk of Faith have I found it to be a secure place to be able to accept those things I cannot change and to move towards the changes I so deeply seek.

Some days I still sit and wonder, much like you, but If I can move past it and get ahead, then so can You.

 

I need you…

I long for closeness

I hope for tenderness

I wish for love

I dream of being swept off my feet

I think of things we could do

I wait hopelessly for you

I sit alone

I feel left behind and unwanted

I long for support and comfort

I see the road i dreamed and yet steer away from it

I see my wish. My hope. My dream so far from me

I wait, but not much more can i take

I speak but words dont much say

Bitter sweet times

Today started off chaotic, busy, hectic, but sweet, funny, chatty, fun. On one hand husband again useless around the morning, but the sweetness and charisma of our two girls made for a better turnaround in my mind. Then work showed its ugly head by being so busy I didn’t even take my legally required lunch. I got words and errors called out and blown out of proportion. Making me feel totally inadequate to do what I do . I needed support, I needed a helping hand and instead received cold shoulder and angry responses. Had things to get done as I always do, did them all me with the girls. I am wonder if I’ve fallen into a routine and now loveless marriage. I refuse to live like people we know who can’t tolerate each other. Id rather be alone…

Journey of a lifetime

Journeys are meant to be fun explorative experiences during which we often find out things about ourselves we didn’t already know. Marriage and children is a unique journey many of us take. We all live similar experiences but the outcome can be so varied due to the different personalities which compose our family unit.

Our journey down this path began over ten years ago, but ten years ago we got married, we vowed to do til death do us part. It’s been one hell of a ride, see we were so young, we thought we ruled the world. The first couple years we struggled to find our way rhythm, then came baby. With baby we found a renewed sense of life love and commitment. She helped us evolve and grow and mature. Furthermore we had someone we both loved unequivocally. No one else could understand us but each other, making it essential for us to focus on the marriage.

Fast forward to married year 9. Find us getting news. We were expecting again. We’d spent some years trying for baby two to no avail. The year prior we’ve had a misscarriage it crushed us. Needless to say year ten brought us baby two. Our family is complete the journeys been long, but the destinations have been well worth it.

Fathers everywhere

Today a special day, a day in which we celebrate dads. We are both blessed to have ours around, they raised us in the same home as our moms. They cared for us the best way they knew how. We get to celebrate them today, I am blessed to also have my grandpa, my last remaining. He is a bit incapacitated last week his health took a downturn and he ended up in the hospital. While visiting him though, we got to laugh and enjoy silly moments which will surely last in my mind forever. He has dementia and little by little we are losing the man we once knew. Breaks my heart, but i am ever so grateful to have him near. Our family grew by one new daddy this year. I have several brothers in law they are now all dads. They are all awesome. My brother, one of two, is a dad to five kids, he does the job like it is something in his bones. Amazing man. We are blessed to have my husband, he’s a daddy to two girls and he loves this task. He rocks at daddy hood. Im so proud of how he’s grown and evolved. I fall in love more when i see him with them. Overall my dad and all the dads in our lives were loved pampered and spoiled by all of us. May we remember to do it daily