In all the journeys I have taken in my life…
There have been many challenging ones, I am a sister, a daughter, an aunt, a Mommy, but I am also a Wife.
Relationships- MOST of which We are born into via our family units…but that Marital Status- WE choose.
I chose 9 years ago to be with someone who made me feel alive.
Today that feeling is a bit different, some may wonder if this means its bad, or gone wrong.
Today- I came home, I gave a quick tap kiss to the man who has been waiting for me all day (He works nights now).
I barely spoke two words to him, had a crappy day at work, he tries to probe but sees I am not up for it, so he gives me space.
This man, I have woken up next to for six and a half years, a boy who grew into the man I know today.
We have both come such a long way, we have grown so much as a couple, but also individually.
Since our journey began, we both went to school, I got my degree, he went and got certified for Videography, We became parents, we became adults together.
In all the years I have known him, my tears still compel him, they bring him down to his more sensitive being, I can also rile him up and drive him crazy, (i know it too and sometimes I push his buttons to cause a reaction)….
It’s been six and a half years of wedded “bliss”, Whoever called it BLISS was telling you the biggest lie in the universe.
CHOOSING to be Married, takes on a whole new meaning when you go in NOT believing it Should ever end.
I married this man of mine, I vowed forever.
The Good the bad the ugly the dirty all OF it I signed up for.
Sure each marriage has its own quirks…
Each marriage as unique as the two hearts that decide to enter into it.
So as I type this I laugh to myself, because I know how ridiculous some people may feel, when they truly believe it will always last… the butterflies. the love letters. the hearts and flowers, yea all that crap ends…. it dies with day to day repetition, routines, responsibilities and every day requirements.
In my marriage we both have always worked, which means we share a lot of the home work load, and often times our WORK zone is never unified. Its usually one is ready to CLEAN house and the other is not.
We have a daughter who requires more attention that any pile of dishes.
We have alternate work schedules. he works nights, i work days. our evenings are split between chores, baby and trying to squeeze some time of intimate conversation/activities before Im too tired or he goes to work.
I felt like writing about us….
I felt i wanted to share what you do find in marriage…
Marriage is work, constant babysitting of the relationship.
It requires a lot of maintenance and spot checks, it requires commitment from all parties, it requires time, it requires no fighting, no hassles, no nagging.
It is a tender relationship balance, in which two people dance the dance of Love.
In my Husband, I have found someone who can drive me absolutely insane, but he also pushes me to be better. to try harder to be optimistic. He shows me a side of things I dont normally see, he helps me to keep things light and also reels me in when I start to lose myself. He helps to make sense of this chaotic thing we call Life. Sometimes he does it all without saying a word, his touch, his embrace, his sighs when he holds me at night, all make me feel like I have a safe haven with him.
He is my HOME button. He is my supporter and I am his. We arent perfect, but WHO is?!
We went into this thing, much younger, much inexperienced, and I’d say we are holding our own out here in Married land.
I love him, each and every day for so many different reasons, some days it is uniquely relevant that This Man I married, truly was meant to be mine.
Our marriage vowed before God, and our family and friends, has been a great blessing, and as you lovebirds out there seek love. fear not for the rough times, but rejoice in the happy moments in every moment in between.
I once heard- all the happy photos is what you capture, but its the difficult times in between each photo that make Those Happy Captured memories worthwhile.
So struggle on, but have faith that in the end, what is meant to be, will be.